How to wear the kilt
It's very easy for we rather straight-laced Scots to shudder at
some of the sights we see at Highland games outside Scotland -
kilted apparitions wearing everything they could find in the
Hollywood wardrobes department and wearing it proudly, totally
unaware that it may have reduced them to a figure of fun in some
eyes. Now . . . it's not up to us to dictate how you should
celebrate your roots, so please just look upon this basic advice
from the old country as helping you to avoid provoking pitying
looks or sniggers from any Highland forebears watching over you
from that great Brigadoon in the sky!
The most important points to bear in mind before you even get
measured up for a kilt are, that Highland dress is not a uniform
(unless you're in a Scottish regiment or a pipe band) and neither
is it fancy dress. You should look upon a kilt as an alternative to
trousers and wear it accordingly. If you want to wear it with a
summer T-shirt and bare legs ending in flip-flops, then feel free
to do so. If you fancy it with a polo short and Nike trainers, then
why not! Just as with trousers, how you wear it depends upon the
circumstances; T-shirt and flip-flops won't go down too well at
Granny's funeral and you would want to show appropriate respect by
'dressing up' somewhat: wearing long stockings (hose), smart shoes,
sporran, collar and tie or open-necked shirt and - if the weather
allows, a suitable kilt jacket. Similarly, when it comes to evening
wear, you'll want to make an effort and look as smart as possible -
both from a personal pride point of view and to do justice to your
no doubt glamorously dressed companion. Here again, less is more.
Festooning yourself with sword, dirk, targe, powder horn and - a
cardinal sin - feathers in your bonnet, are not the way to go.
Now you will come across individuals in Scotland and the States
who can be likened to barrack-room lawyers who seem to know
everything about what you should and shouldn't
wear and how you should do it. They want to preserve the
old fashioned image of Highland dress and will regale you with
their 'regulations' at the drop of a hat. Listen politely but don't
be intimidated. Highland dress isn't preserved in aspic, it's a
living, evolving fashion and adding one's own distinctive touches
to it prevents us all becoming homogenised. . . . as long as the
touches don't belittle the dress that you're wearing and cause
offence to others who hold their heritage dear.
Space doesn't allow going into the finer details of each element
of Highland dress so perhaps I can dip in here and there and
mention some of the most frequent areas of confusion:
There shouldn't be any need to actually point out that a kilt is
not a skirt, but having seen the embarrassing sight of a Canadian
school pipe band visiting Scotland with the poor boys dressed in
billowing TARTAN SKIRTS, perhaps it does need to be mentioned in
passing.
It should also be mentioned that the pleats go to the back!
Insulting your intelligence you might think? You wouldn't say that
if you'd seen Virgin Atlantic boss Richard Branson ( a 'Brit')
alighting from one of his trains in Edinburgh last year with his
kilt on back to front! It got caught in a door handle, one of his
aides claimed. As we scornfully say in Scotland: 'That'll be
right!"
When it comes to those long stockings we call hose, ignore the
fact that Sean Connery and thousands of Scots don't know any better
and wear sparkling white - don't you do it! How this
predilection came about can probably be blamed on kilt hire
companies who, like Henry Ford and his 'any colour you like as long
as it's black', offer you any colour you like as long as it's
white! For them it makes sense and cuts down enormously on the
stock they must hold. Aesthetically however, gleaming white hose
destroys the look of Highland dress. Hose should be coloured and
should blend in with the tartan being worn whether you're in day or
evening wear. For the latter, black hose is probably the best since
it's odds on that you'll be wearing a black jacket. Whitish hose is
not taboo altogether - the off-white , creamy colour of undyed yarn
goes extremely well with some kilts.
We mentioned feathers in one's bonnet earlier and should
emphasise that it's viewed as the worst possible taste to wear
eagle feathers in your bonnet to which you're not entitled. They're
not fancy dress and have a long established significance in
Scotland that shouldn't be trampled on. Here's what the late Sir
Iain Moncreiffe of that Ilk had to say on the subject:
"The convention has long been established that a chief wears
three eagle feathers, the chieftains of cadet* branches and Feudal
Barons* wear two and the gentleman (armigers*) of the clan may wear
one feather. The Sovereign, as Chief of Chiefs, wears four.")
Lecture over!!!!
The subject of Highland dress can occupy a complete book - in fact
the late Charles Thompson proved it by writing 'So you're going
to wear the kilt?' and one piece of advice that many of us on
this side of the Atlantic would disagree with is his assertion that
'At the very longest, the kilt should reach only to the top of the
knee.' At that height it tends to lose its elegance and
its admired swing and fills onlookers with trepidation in case the
wearer should bend over too far. Which brings us to that well-worn
music hall joke about what's worn under the kilt.
There are certainly Scottish regiments in which it is an offence
to wear underpants or shorts unless special conditions aply -
Highland dancing or hurricanes. In fact, the writer's father who
was a drill sergeant in one such regiment had a car wing mirror
fitted onto the end of his pace stick and would walk along the
parade line to ensure that everyone was appropriately
undressed!
However . . . we're skirting the main question here. Should male
kiltwearers go breeched or unbreeched? Here's some advice from
American Bob Martin, KIlt historian and kiltmaker of many decades
experience.
Now, to the breeching of the kilt. The only good and
sensible reasonfor the wearing of undies (and I do mean undies, NOT
Bermuda shorts,basketball shorts, etc.) with the kilt is out of
deference to someoneor something. Many men may feel, and with good
cause, that should theirkilts fly up, exposing them to the world,
it would be an embarrassmentto their wives or children.
Many men may wear underwear out of consideration for the
generalpublic which, perhaps, might be embarrassed, especially here
in theStates. The deference may be for the man's church, Or his
employer, oreven for himself. Though a man may very well desire to
wear his kiltunbreeched, he must be respected and not chided for
putting his ownwants second. Some men, on the other hand, must wear
underwear withtheir kilts for medical or physical reasons. Whatever
the reason, noexplanation should be required.
Problems sometimes arise with kilt-wearers when people,
mostly infun, attempt to find out for themselves what there is
beneath the kilt.I feel these attempts occur mostly with the
younger set of kilted men.With older men, the tries would be far
fewer, if at all. I've never hadmy kilt touched by strangers with
the thought in mind of seeing whatthere was to see. If one is
rather embarrassed to wear the kilt inpublic, and shows it, then
that one had best be prepared for suchonslaughts or leave the kilt
at home. I believe one's self-assuredbearing has very much to do
with the public's reaction to seeing thekilt. Of course, the entire
affair can be handled by ignoring thesituation. After all, it's the
other person's problem, not ours, isn'tit?
To supplement Bob's comments we would just add one further point
- a rather distasteful one, but one that needs saying nevertheless.
Many kilthire shops tell nightmarish tales of the state of kilts
received back after being worn by unbreeched hirers. For new
kilt-wearers, the skill of toiletting is not an instantly acquired
ability and that frequently leaves its mark!
*An armiger is a person
entitled to bear heraldic arms i.e. he has his own coat of arms
granted by a competent heraldic authority. Feudal barons are
individuals who may have inherited - or bought - an old barony (a
parcel of land gifted by royalty with the title of Baron.) Baronies
can be bought and sold and the title of Baron passes with the
property. Cadet branches are sub branches of the main
clan.